Please help me I am Falling………..

How come all the lady skaters fell in their fannies? Just think of all the work it took the top figure skaters not only to qualify for the Olympics but make it into the finals then perform and be in the position to win a metal.. The Years of practice…. The cost their parents went to in cash and time… The hours of coaching… The search for the right music and the costumes…. And then going out and falling on one’s tail bone? Come on!

Several years ago my brother talked me into going skating at the new Pettit Center Ice Track in West Allis WI. It’s an amazing place where our top speed skaters work out, the home track of Bonnie Blair, Dan Jensen and the new kid, Shaunie Davis. It’s a beautiful indoor ice track well lighted with benches and a warming area.

After lacing up we took to the ice. My brother played hockey in college, a fine skater. He had in five laps to my ¾ lap when the strangest thing happened. The stars came out indoors and they were swirling. This had not happened to me since the time I fell trying a water ski ramp 360 embedding my head into the jump’s surface, mucho stars.

Getting up from the ice I was ready to punch the SOB that tripped me. The only person close was a little girl who skated up and asked, “Mister, are you alright?” Wasn’t that thoughtful?

The other night while watching the ladies competition I didn’t see any of those smooth Italian guys come up to any fallen lady asking if they were alright. What’s happen to manors anyway?
Maybe they were afraid someone would notice a pizza one of the guys on the top balcony had spilled onto the ice.